You're My Everything

*Not a saint, always never a saint

2010-04-28T18:14:00.000-07:00

Watching an old show, 谈判专家 right now. This show was being first being watch when i was just..10+ years old??

From this show, i learnt that, i may have thought that i had forgotten or rather i can forget bout some things. But in the end, it's just equivalent to lying to oneself. And it applies to me. Some things are just not within my control; i'm not a saint.

Neglection

2010-04-24T11:57:00.000-07:00

These days, i'm not feeling good. I'm facing some things that i hated most.

1: Neglection in relationship :

You may think you're doing things that you love most, and you may think that you're doing things that is meant for our future. But have it ever crossed your mind, even it you made big bucks one day, even if you're damned successful one day and can allow me to lead a good life... have i already left you?? I MEAN WHAT IF.. WHAT IF one day you really manage to be successful BUT I MAY HAVE ALREADY LEFT YOU??? I'M SAYING WHAT IF.

I admit, yes i admit. I do admit i'm spoilt. I'M A TOTAL SPOILT-BRAT. Sad to say, but this is something that couldnt be changed.

Fishing and gaming. I didnt stopped you for both. But did it ever crossed your mind that you had neglected me so much just with either one of them? Working + either one of them + me working. Both of us with different timing for work, and yet all these took away your time for me. Have you wondered how i feel?

2: The way i'm being treated:

Remember that very day? I had really wanted to leave you. I really wanted, cos i believed i shouldnt deserve all these; i deserve better. I know this thing had already passed and i shouldnt bring it up again; but some how i just couldnt make myself forget. I didnt know why i would turn back, maybe i really shouldnt reply any of the messages. Maybe i would feel better that way and even now. Cos.. i turn back in beliving that maybe i would get better treatment and not NUMBER 1.

Maybe.. just like what joyce say. I should have suffer from amnesia and forget everything. Maybe i would be better that way.

Long Time No See!

2010-04-17T10:08:00.000-07:00

WOW! It's been such a long time ever since i last blogged. Sorry peeps! I've been real busy with my work. Just some recent updates:

1: I havent start earning money as i spend my time on learning so please dont question bout whether property can really earn money or not.

2: I've finally gotten my 1st badge and first 2 certificates! Yeah!

3: I'm happy with my job and everything except for relationship.

4: The happiest thing for now; OUR CUTE LITTLE PRETTY APPLE IS FINALLY MARRIED WITH A GOOD HUSBAND TIAN SONG! CONGRATS BABE AND MAY THE BOTH OF YOU LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!! :))))

5:Hereby, I would like to thanks everyone who gave me encouragements with my new job and supports for my decisions and understanding! Love you all many many!!

Shall upload photos soon cos i'm lazy and i've got to wake up at 8am to work tomorrow morning and it'll be a long day ahead!! Nights peeps!

Devastated

2010-03-12T12:09:00.000-08:00

What have i done to deserve all these from you? Why must i go through all these when i'm not in the wrong? Who am i or rather what am i to you? If you think that you're right den fine!! I'll fuck off from your sight!

其实我不快乐

2010-03-05T10:13:00.000-08:00

I'm unhappy. Really very unhappy. None of my surrounding people knows why. Not mei mei, not joyce, not hubby. NONE. You know why? Cos i also dontknow what's the real reason that caused me to unhappy. Or MAYBE, i know it deep down inside why i'm unhappy, but i just push it right deep down back to my heart and didnt have the guts to face it, or rather, dreadfully unwilling to face it. I'm sorry to people around me for venting my unhappiness on you guys. I'm dreadfully sorry, i didnt mean it, hope you all understand.

对不起。大家，真的很抱歉。

Went to Icon Bar / Live Impact @ Shenton Way on the 26th of February to celebrate Mei Mei's birthday that falls on the 27th. Went Flirtatious @ 65 Tanjong Pagar Road on the 27th of February to celebrate Jiao Kia's birthday whose birthday falls on the same day. Shall upload photos soon.

Pardon me for my english, guys. My mind's gonna stop functioning soon.

-_-

2010-02-24T11:19:00.001-08:00

stress stress stress!!!!!!!!

New Beginning

2010-02-12T12:52:00.000-08:00

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Call 98750990 to enroll today!

*Spammers need not call. Thanks!

Everything Takes Time

2010-02-09T02:12:00.000-08:00

Been staying at home for the past one week plus to do household chores as parents were not in town.Went to geylang Zhuhai with Irwin Brother and Fong as they are both off last wednesday,and Brother Irwin bring me along.Thanks Brother.After that went Lunar with Fong and hubby after hubby off work and Irwin brother was gone like fcuk.LOL.Had a great time with all of them. :)

Went to Golden Mile this morning to fetch Fong's friend from Malaysia.Settled down in a thai shop to have som-tam.

May you really find your happiness

2010-01-25T12:40:00.000-08:00

It's true, what comes around goes around. There'll forever be retribution or rather karma for every single bad that you've done to others before. I dontknow if i should congrats you that you've met her, as i dontknow how is she like.

However, i sincerely hope, you'll really find your happiness. All the best, WZ.

LONG LONG POST

2010-01-23T16:03:00.001-08:00

Today, i'm gonna do something which i've not been doing for a long long time.I'm going to have a very long post to vent every single thing out! If you're unhappy reading my blog den kindly FUCK OFF! In randomness:

Till today,i've changed.I've changed to someone better,i dare to say this. But i can tell every single one of you who reads my blog, i fucking hate some people around me. And i know who are the ones giving chances and who are the ones creating trouble out of nowhere! I may have done wrong, but at least i've got the guts to admit and have the heart to change for the better! Unlike some people, dare to do dont dare to admit! Hiding behind people back and saying all things that doesnt concerns you! Pardon me for my usage of english as i just wish to vent every single thing out in my own way! As for who the one i'm talking bout, it's for me to know and for you readers to think and guess. But i'm not gonna say, the one who feels that i'm talking bout him/her is the one who's guilty! Actually, things had already past, but somehow i just wish to vent it all out. THIS IS MY BLOG,MY PERSONAL VENTING SPACE,MY OWN WORLD.IF YOU DONT LIKE IT,THEN JUST KINDLY FUCK OFF AND GET OUT OF HERE!! NO TAGS NEEDED IF YOU MEANT TO SPAM!!

When things happen or something goes wrong, you will think of TAN SIEW PING, will look for TAN SIEW PING, will push to TAN SIEW PING la. When things are right in the path, when you're having good times, you will THINK OF TAN SIEW PING OR NOT??!!! NA BEI CHEE BYE!! YOU THINK WHAT??!! TAN SIEW PING VERY GOOD TO MAKE USE AH???!! TAN SIEW PING VERY SOFT HEARTED CAN MAKE USE ALSO LAH?????!!! EH!!!! LANJIAO LA YOU!!! CB KIA!!!

When you need help, since when i didnt help you when you open mouth? Did i have second thought? Did i say NO? Did i do nice nice give you or not?! Say the truth la, YOU NOT VER OR JOYCE LEE WHOM I KNOW FOR AT LEAST TEN YEARS OR MORE LEH, AND NOT THE REST WHOM I HAD BEEN WITH LOTS OF YEARS LEH FOR EXAMPLE TSL AND CYW LEH, I GOT THE RIGHT NOT TO HELP YOU LEH!! EVEN AFTER HELPING YOU, I GOT ASK ANY REPAYMENT FROM YOU OR NOT??!! YOU TOUCH YOUR HEART AND ASK YOURSELF LA!!!! ALL BECAUSE OF WHAT??!!! YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY????!!! ALL BECAUSE TAN SIEW PING IS A STUPID IDIOTIC MORON WHO IS AN EXTREMELY SOFT HEARTED PERSON MA!!!! AM I RIGHT????!!!!! PCB!!

Till today, i'm really glad, i'm really very very happy. Cos i've known who are the ones who are really giving me chances to change for the better, who are the ones who really cares for me, who are the ones who really stood by my side. I've opened my eyes big enough to really see. Thanks guys, i love all of you. Especially my hubby.

Ok. I'm done venting. Going to sleep now. Nights and morning. :)

FICTION??

2010-01-19T02:56:00.000-08:00

So near yet so far.

Just what i'm thinking?

Time Flies

2010-01-16T04:16:00.000-08:00

How time flies. It's been a year ever since i'm together with hubby. Yes,indeed, it's actually a very short period to every one. But somehow i really realised, time is really not a matter, it's the things we had actually gone through together as one. From the very first day i've been asking myself, am i really ready to take this path? But somehow, i can now answer to myself, i'm glad that i took it.

Ups and downs, dangerous situation, penniless days..on and on. We've both held to each other's hand tightly and walked it through together. It sounds like i'm really getting married. Lol.

Thanks hubby,for being there for whenever i'm in need, thanks for being my companion, my listening ear, my shoulder, my hands and my legs; basically thanks for being every part of me! Lol. Baby, i love you. :)

Steamboat at bugis with my hubby's feminine gay partner, 我们家的小白, Mr Fong!!! Lol.

Wishes

2010-01-13T12:12:00.000-08:00

My Baobei Kai Kai has been sick for around a week, fever coming and goes. So worried bout him. Think he's got frightened. Sincerely hope and pray hard that he'll get well soon.

Just got to know my baby with hubby is a girl, decided to name her 洪思颖. Will be praying her soon. Baby, always remember that mama and papa loves you and we'll never ever forget you. You're our precious little one.

Finally,my Baobei has entered school. Here's some of his photo which i find it very cute and sweet. :)

His Wifey To Be

2010-01-11T11:44:00.000-08:00

Just came back from KL with Hubby and his colleague cum his gay partner and my "handsome xiao bai" Ah Fong.LOL! Was actually planned to go on the 19th and 20th of this month but due to some changes,which is regarding to Mr Fong, we scheduled it earlier. 2 days 1 night trip was short, but its fun enough with lots of jokes.Didnt take much pictures as i didnt bring my charger along. Will be going during July again. Looking forward to it.

Went to one of the shopping centres, with all branded shops in there. Went into Soo Kee Jewellery (KL) to look for solitaire. It's damned fucking cheap la (certified diamond at wholesale prices) !! Had one of them in mind already. :)

I'm not happy,not with the trip nor anyone else,it's with myself. Really stupid. What's really wrong with me??

Enjoy the pictures. :)

Happy New Year!!

2010-01-01T08:08:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year everybody!

New year's eve, 65 and Icon Bar, with Mei Mei, Crystal and her husband. Thanks hubby, you've really GAVE ME AN UNFORGETTABLE NIGHT! You know what i mean.

New Year, New resolutions.

1:My whole family to be safe, healthy and happy.
2:Get a job of $1500-$1800 basic pay fast.
3:Clear every single cent of the debts of mine.
4:Save up and have more money in CPF.
5:Get a dream flat of me and hubby.
6:New handphone.
7:My LV Trevi.
8:A quiet and peaceful life like what i've been going through these past months.
9:Hubby and me to be as stable.
10:To maintain or to be even slimmer than now. :)

Hibernating

2009-12-26T17:07:00.001-08:00

Problem: Am I asking for too much, or am I just too difficult to understand??

Reason: You just dontknow what I want, and you just dontknow what I'm having in my thoughts.

Conclusion: I'm having second thoughts.

If Only

2009-12-25T13:32:00.000-08:00

I wonder, how much do you really know me??

Sometimes, i just wished that,you can just understand me more. And know what i really want,what i'm really thinking.

Losing more and more confident.

Boredom

2009-12-23T13:29:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve tonight,but hubby wont be around. :_(

Yeah Yeah Yeah

2009-12-18T10:21:00.000-08:00

Malaysia trip with hubby, mei mei and monster. Went JB previously too with hubby. Enjoy the pictures and video. Video taken in hotel,nonsensical and full of craps. Right at the bottom,enjoy. :)

Memories

2009-12-12T10:23:00.000-08:00

Went to mei mei's Windows Live Profile just now, and had been running to and fro to her house these few days to help out as they renovated their house.

Went through lots of photos and all the past memories came flashing back into my mind. Really missed the old times we had together; Me, Mei Mei, Adeline Yeo, Mei Shemn, Regina, Ting Ting, Jia Jia, Mei Jing and so on. All of us was like, full of nonsense, no burdens, innocent and naive, living our daily lives fruitfully and fulfilly, never ever thought of any thing nor any consequence.

Taking every single thing that comes our way, living the life of "the tough gets going,the going gets tough". Maybe to all of you, the understanding of our pasts may sound unbelievable, but its really.. too good to be true. Lol. But we are all just mischievious. We dont mean any harm. Lol.

And now, i must really say, the good old times could never be found again, and all these shall live in my mind forever and ever. I LOVE ALL OF YOU. Kallang Bahru, St George, Bendemeer live forever. Thanks for being part of me, and thanks for everything we've been through together, nothing can ever, ever replace every single of you, i promise.

yeah!!

2009-12-02T13:54:00.000-08:00

Going out with hubby later on.But realised that there's nowhere to go.Any idea,anyone?

Boring

2009-11-25T10:02:00.000-08:00

At home,drinking campbell soup. Been thinking over and over again about what had happened the other day. Talked to ah jie on phone last night. Thanks jie,i'm really touched by what you've said.Wont be at home for this period of time. Party on Saturday. Looking forward to it!!! :)

A Day To Remember

2009-11-20T14:23:00.000-08:00

20th November 2009,simply a day that i'll remember forever.Never ever will i forget.After that day,think our relationship will be even stronger.And of cos,as what i've mentioned,Kallang Bahru sisters will always be the ones.And also you,Kai li and Jie.Sincerely a thanks to you my dearest Li Jie,and sorry for waking you up from your sleep.

Historical moment in my life. :)

Finally!!

2009-11-18T11:10:00.000-08:00

Finally,i got to remember my password,and managed to get in here after such a long time.Felt so pissed off with almost everything in my life.People,surroundings,things happening,and so so on.

Have just completed my exams,which consists of Elementary Mathematics,History,Literature and Higher Mother Tongue.Well,i dontknow how bad will i do,but i'm confident that i'll do better than last year's result.And,i did something which i had never thought i would have done,and i know it very well that it could have drag my grades down.

The topics of the composition consist of "friend",newspaper article and so so on.Of course i took the topic friend.And the most unbelievable thing was,i wrote bout this particular friend,whom i had known for 9 years till now.Not my mei mei ver,but another girl.And not because i dont dote on nor thankful to mei mei,but i believe that mei mei have this mutual understanding between us.As for this particular friend of mine,i shall call her my sister,we had been not that close,till close,to not so close again after some quarrels,and now,we are good again.Other den mei mei,she's the one whom stood by me,and advised me not to bother with anything else,lent me a helping hand,and stood out for me.千言万语，尽在不言中。Thanks sister,you know who you are.

From every single thing that has happened,i realised that,you really dont need a lot of friends,just a few ones will do.Had a talk with Jie just now,that's what she says too.She says:"For what do you need so many friends?Are you sure there wont be anyone among them out to harm you?Are you sure they will treat you true-heartedly?"Just how many of them will they be around for you when you really need help??

And,thanks to those who stayed with me throughout.Thank you so much.I love you guys!!!!

Tired

2009-07-20T02:08:00.000-07:00

Have been working and working recently,studies almost occupied my free time,regardless of working hours,sleeping and off days.Really tired.When can i really have my real free time?

Meeting hubby later.No money,no nothing.Everyday like a walking zombie.Didn't really have the chance to relax myself.Have to be home early during my off days if i have work the next day to have my beauty sleep earlier.Sis have been having work brought to home to continue so she had to turn on the lights which caused me to unable to have a good night rest.I'm going crazy.

*Own house,own privacy,own money,own space,own time to do whatever i want.WHEN CAN I HAVE THESE??!!

TIRED

2009-07-13T23:26:00.000-07:00

Hyprocrits are simply everywhere,even the ones who you think that are closest to you are too. Yes,felt down.You won't know who are really the ones true to you.So what if you put in effort to change?They may say they give you chances,but do they really mean what they say?

Been quarrelling even more than usual with baby.Maybe it's my thinking.Things have changed,it's not like before.You don't understand what i'm talking 'bout,and the meaning behind it.I'm not good at words,i know.I dont understand the things you mean either at times.Indeed,it takes two hands to clap.Does quarrels really make the relationship stronger and the couples may understand each other more or quarrels just hurt and makes things worse?

Started work on the 9th of July.Tiring.13 hours of work everyday,with only 1 hour break time.Wake up at 5am in the morning everyday,and sleep for only 3 to 4 hours everyday due to studies.Will be starting 2nd job soon.I know that i may not be able to take it,but i've got no choice.I want money don't want life.Money is the only one who won't leave you unless you don't want them.

-=Xing Fu Bu Mie=-

2009-07-04T00:04:00.000-07:00

Xing Fu Bu Mie.Great song,nice song.I'm so touch.Thanks for asking me to listen. :)

Give me a break!!

2009-06-26T14:41:00.000-07:00

Father's sick,mother's also sick.Have the kind of feeling that i'm also going to be sick soon.Not beingtoo sensitive,but really feeling unwell.Giddy nowadays,signs of vomitting kept coming day by day,felt so fatigue.In addition to the weather and those flu going around.So tired.

Received my examination timetable a few days back,i'm glad as my exam is to be taken just downstairs my house which only costs me a 5 minutes walk.But at the same time,i'm getting even more stress,as that also means that my exams are getting even closer.If i cant manage to score well,or rather i flung,i'll be letting my family,hubby,and those who really concern bout my results for example,my mei (ver) and her mum down.

Thanks Gan ma,for always giving me advices,and encouraging me for my studies and my future.I'll always remember what i promise you on my birthday last year,and dont worry,i wont pawn ur precious necklace to me away. I Love You and of course my own parents.You are just like my mum. :)

My Goodie Good Friend

2009-06-21T06:17:00.000-07:00

Dearest buddy James See Benedict:

Kindly remember say what i'm going to say now.Dont ever say that you're an asshat ok.You.re an extremely good person with great thinking to me,and even Victor and Wei Ming they all.Indeed,friends come and go,but always remember,there'll always be us the Visual Operation Xeneriods around.Though it's been lots of years,but we are still alive and kicking,isnt it?Do what you think is right,never give up on that particular person too if you think she's worth all your effort and time.But,if she's not,dont bother bout her ever again.YOU HAVE MY SUPPORT.And YES!! I MISS ALL OF YOU A GREAT DEAL!!!!!!

2009-06-20T16:55:00.000-07:00

Went to Boat Quay with mei to do somethings last night,and havent been sleeping ever since i reach home.Sometimes i'm really unhappy with myself,and sometimes i'm thinking that i study is a wastage of time and money.Cant even do what i want even if i study hard.

Going out soon.Old and new photos updates.

Presenting my naughty little baby from past till now.Kai Shih Hao Ren.

Mei's(Ver) 21st birthday.

What's the definition of a true relationship?

2009-06-19T12:40:00.000-07:00

In sis's (ver) house now,and it's already the 3rd day camping over at her house.

Broken up with her SUPER DUPER SUPER GLUE,FINALLY!!2 years plus of relationship.Ya,it may sound too short a period for lots of people,but somehow,it's been too long for her i think.LOL.

Yes,she's been using him all over these years,but after all it's a 2 years going to 3 years of companion,"love",wastage of time,chance of saving money,her own money.But...i know it deep down that,she did have some feelings for him,or maybe really a lot of feelings.No matter what's the case.she's been a bit out of her mind nowdays,in addition of his continous pestering.Feel so farked up!!

So, seriously speaking,i really dontknow what's the real definition of a true relationship.I'm so confuse now.All i know is to look after her for the time being,that's the least i can do being an older sis.

:(

stress

2009-06-13T05:54:00.000-07:00

DONT LOOK FOR ME FOR E TIME BEING.LET ME COOL DOWN.THANKS.

Complicated

2009-06-13T03:30:00.000-07:00

Went for gathering with babes yesterday,orchard,followed by viva,icon with baby,and discovery with mummy,joyce and apple.

Just 89,i can realise that i'm not a good gf,not a good life-long partner.I can't really give what he wants.I'm just selfish,unreasonable,spoilt.Is it when i wish to change a part of me which is bad,e better side of me will just turn bad in order to get a balance?I really dontknow.I'm really stress and unhappy.

Am I too late?

2009-06-06T23:49:00.000-07:00

Now then i came to realise,family ties are really the most important.

Mum just finished operation 1 or 2 months ago.And now it's dad's turn.Why must such things happen to my parents?I would rather i'm the one going through all these.

Had been quarreling too often nowadays.Maybe really should go for my checkup.Dontknow how long can the both of us take it.

No longer myself

2009-06-02T04:19:00.000-07:00

Headache. Sick and tired. Everything seems so wrong. Am i wrong in everything? A bad girlfriend? Maybe, most probably, i should hide myself up and think thoroughly.

2009-05-20T21:48:00.000-07:00

Have been alone this past few days,thinking bout lots of things.Just finish watching JIN SHI LIANG YUAN.After watching,a thinking came across my mind.Is it really that,only when i die,things then will come to light?

Words are harsh,but,maybe this is the only way.

2009-05-14T11:49:00.000-07:00

New Hairstyle.Heart pain.Still wish to say sorry to whom i've done wrong before.Sorry.Hope i'll be able to start anew just like my hairstyle.A better life,a better person,a better character.Will you all forgive me?Feeling really down.Appears to be fine,but it's only on the outer surface.Inner me contains nothing but heart pain and guilt.

2009-05-14T00:32:00.000-07:00

Stress!!Just when can i get my maths formula into my head??I just simply can't get anyone of them into my head,only history;and it's not much.

I really must buck up with my maths.The most important.Feeling so down.Lucky i have Mr Ang and my babes as my pillar of strength.Wish me luck!!

2009-05-12T12:09:00.000-07:00

Emo.No friends,no nothing.All alone.

2009-05-12T02:27:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone!!Finally i'm back!!Sorry to keep you all waiting guys!!Firstly,Thanks Jolene Babe for helping me with this blog.Credits goes to her. :) Thanks!!

Happy Anniversary to me and my Mr Ang.Dear,thanks for everything that you had done for me on that day.It's the ever first time you did so much,and i'm really touched with your effort and everything that you had done.Thanks so much dear!I LOVE YOU!

Same routine going on everyday.Maybe it's a good thing.Had been thinking bout lots of things this few days.There are some people who appear to be so "plastic".They'll only come looking for you when they need your help.Sometimes i'm really wondering,who are really my true friends?But finally,i know who are they and they will always be kept inside my heart.I won't mention any names or whatsoever regarding them.And those plastic people,please please get away from me.I dont need you.

Went to celebrate Hao's birthday last wednesday and went for kor kor's wedding dinner last sunday.Had enjoyable moments with them.KOR,DA SAO,MAY THE BOTH OF YOU HAVE A BLISSFUL MARRIAGE!!

Happy anniversary to me and my mr ang!!

Hubby's sis house.

Fish & Co.

Basketball court.